MARRIAGE COUNSELING: ARE YOU BORED WITH ME?

Do you have a boring relationship with your partner? Where has all the excitement gone?

The couples I see in my Couples Expert office practice often tell me that all the fun has gone out of their interactions with each other. There’s just no laughter, no joy and no excitement in their lives, and sometimes it’s been this way for years.  The kids, the house, their jobs, their routine; all the fun has gone out of it. They still love each other but that feeling they describe is not the kind of love they felt when they first fell in love, when they got married or when they moved in together. They’ve lived this way for too long and they’re feeling stuck, tired, lonely and sad and they don’t know how to get it back.

When you’re stuck in a cycle of negative feelings and conflict it’s very difficult to see a way out of it.  One of the ways to do it successfully is to begin to talk to each other about the way you both feel without blaming or pointing fingers or finding fault. Without a doubt, you both have responsibility for making your lives the way they are now, but the main focus should not be on your boring relationship but on moving forward and changing those feelings.

Get help from a couples counselor to help you reframe your interactions from negatives to positives so that you both can see that you really do love each other and your boring relationship doesn’t have to remain stuck in boring land forever.  You can bring back the fun, the play, the sense of excitement and passion that you once had together. Remember why you fell in love? It wasn’t to have a boring relationship. It was to have great times, fun adventures and to build and share a life together. Say goodbye to your boring relationship and hello to living a life together where you are both emotionally connected, having your needs met and feeling loved and important. Life can be exciting again. You can make that happen. Don’t wait another day.