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Hello and welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast with your host Stuart Fensterheim, The Couples Expert. This is episode 171 of our show. Today Stuart is going to be discussing the impact of lies and deceit on your love relationship.

There’s nothing more uncertain than questioning whether you can count on what your partner is telling you is the truth. Can you believe what your partner is telling you? Is your partner really there for you? What kind of relationship do you have if your partner is lying?

What you’ll learn from today’s podcast:

  • Trust is the foundation of the relationship 2:38
  • Omission is deception 4:07
  • Lies mean that you don’t have a true partnership 7:29
  • You should be sharing everything together 9:28
  • Fear, shame or guilt is the basis for avoiding certain subjects 11:15
  • White lies are still lies 15:53

[spp-tweet tweet=” There should be nothing you cannot share with your partner “]

It’s so important that you’re authentic with each other. There should never be a reason that you would deceive your partner in any way. Be yourself, say what’s real and you can be confident that your partner loves you no matter what. The foundation of basic trust is what’s needed in the relationship. We’re all flawed, we all make mistakes. You need to keep yourself open and talk to each other about everything. You shouldn’t need to hide anything from your partner, because the love you have is enough for you to work through anything that may come up.

Talk about everything with each other. No matter what happened in your past, you need to share with your partner. Even your difficult issues from past relationships need to be on the table so that you both know what to expect. Don’t leave things unspoken. An omission is a lie. Your partner needs to know they can count on you to tell the truth.

Sponsored by: The Couples Expert is sponsored by the www.thecouplesexperts.com/hold-me-tight. Build communication and connection with your partner in this weekend workshop presented by Stuart Fensterheim, The Couples Expert. https://www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com/hold-me-tight/

Email Stuart at podcast@thecouplesexperts.com with your comments and suggestions on this and future podcasts. Stuart loves to hear from his listeners and will respond to you if you take the time to contact him.

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Next Week on The Couples Expert Podcast

Join us next week on The Couples Expert when Stuart welcomes guest Alana Pratt. They’ll be discussing how to fall in love with yourself so that you can be a good partner for somebody else. It’s all about love on The Couples Expert. We hope you’ll listen in.

Explore Additional Points

There’s nothing better than having a partner that you have full confidence and trust in. You know that they are true, faithful, loyal, and will always have your back. You talk about everything and share with each other all the good bad and in between of your daily lives together. The opposite of this trusting relationship is one where you might withhold details from your partner, or even tell what you might think of as “little white lies.” I call them deadly little white lies, or more simply, lies. Nothing will kill your relationship faster than secrecy and lies. Deception in any form is deadly to trust.

Most of these little white lies come from fear. You tell half-truths or omit details because you’re afraid that your partner will be upset if you tell all. You justify this by thinking you’re protecting your partner and you’re protecting your relationship. This can become a habit, a game you play with yourself and it can actually become addictive. The thrill of putting something over on your partner, and the thrill of doing something illicit when all the while you’re deceiving yourself that you’re not doing anything harmful. This type of behavior starts with those little white lies, but even those can erode your relationship when (not if, when) you’re discovered. Just as with any kind of deception, you end up having to lie, and lie again to cover up the previous lie until you have dug yourself into a pretty deep hole. What do you do then?

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My favorite part of doing these podcasts is participating in the conversations they provoke. Each week I present one question, and this week, here is our focus: Question: What is an area in your life that has been impacted by your relationship with your partner?

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