If you were a player in your younger years , taking out a lot of women , seeing multiple partners at the same time you may remember how that felt. Relationships were all about the conquest, about getting in her pants, getting her to fall for your line. Trying to see how many women you could have, get into bed, or even just get her digits. You’re not alone. This is a pattern that many young men get into.

At some point though, something changes.  Those superficial connections just aren’t doing it for you anymore. Now what? You begin to think about finding the one. That one person you could be with forever, the one you want to be married to, have a family with.  You start to think about the future and what settling down might look like.

It’s time to bench the player and change your ways. The roving eye has to settle on one woman and stay there. When you make a commitment to your future wife and the mother of your future children you must devote yourself solely to her. Don’t mess it up by being unfaithful in thought or in deed. Don’t check out other women, don’t flirt with other women. If you think you’ll be tempted to hit on a woman when you’re out with your boys stay home. Don’t put yourself into any situation where you might be tempted to be unfaithful.

Being true to one woman isn’t hard if it’s the right woman. When you find that one, the one you want to spend the rest of your life with, you will no longer be a player. You’ll be a husband, a significant other, a domestic partner. You’ll find that monogamy is just as fun and exciting as playing the field ever could be.

Subscribe to My YouTube Channel

Ask Me a Question

If you have a question, comment, thought, or concern, feel free to comment below. We’d love to hear from you!

Facebook Comments


About the Author:

Stuart Fensterheim, LCSW helps couples to overcome the disconnection in their relationships As an author, blogger and podcaster, Stuart has helped couples around the world to experience a unique relationship in which they can feel special and important, confident in knowing they are loved deeply and that their presence matters. His weekend workshop, Two Days: Seven Conversations has become a popular venue for many to set off on their journey of connectedness. The Couples Expert Podcast consists of weekly provocative conversations offering the perspectives and insight of experts from a variety of relationship related fields. Stuart also offers daily relationship video tips on The Couples Expert YouTube channeland by subscription in Stuart’s Daily Notes. Stuart is happily married and a devoted father of 2 daughters. He lives and works in Scottsdale, Arizona.

Leave A Comment


Stuart’s next available appointment is Monday, July 23rd, [9:00] am – [10:30] am.

Click to schedule below.

If you have any questions, please use the message box below or call 480-993-1922.