A guest post by Chantal Gagnon PH.D
And Baby Make 3!
A Marriage Counselor can Help you Adjust to Your New Life and Keep Your Marriage Strong
When you get pregnant, everyone tells you your life is about to change forever, but what they don’t tell you is that a marriage counselor can help you transition into parenthood in a way that safeguards your marriage. We all know that over half of marriages end in divorce (and that’s for first marriages, second marriages have more divorce!) – don’t let that happen to you and your family. The best gift you can give your newborn child is a happy family forever! A marriage counselor can help you do that and get you on the right track before marriage problems get too big to solve.
Having a Baby Can Change Your Romantic Connection & Bring New Challenges
It all starts when the baby is conceived…..Did you both want a child at this particular time? Did you have difficulty conceiving? Did Dad feel pressure to perform on a time click? Did Mom expect Dad to work less hours once the baby came? All of these issues and expectations start playing out for both partners during the pregnancy. Sometimes men don’t know how to emotionally support their pregnant wives or how to ride the waves of hormonal ups and downs. Slowly, distance and resentment can set in. Then, when the baby comes, the sleep deprivation alters our brain chemistry and spouses can have trouble working in synch. Plus, when a woman is sick a lot during pregnancy or has a difficult delivery, sex may not be on her mind much.
If couples don’t talk about their feelings to each other in a supportive, productive way (which quite frankly is a little hard to do with a crying baby who needs to eat every three hours!), the romantic connection erodes.
How a Marriage Counselor Can Help:
5 reasons to see a marriage counselor for post partum depression
A psychotherapist who is also trained in couples therapy can help get your family back on track!
1 ) Your counselor can evaluate mom for postpartum depression, baby blues, and postpartum anxiety and begin treatment to reduce those symptoms.
2) Your counselor will help dad understand the changes mom is going through and learn what words and what behaviors will be most helpful in supporting her.
3) Couples counseling will improve your communication and teach you effective conflict resolution techniques so you can work better as a team to care for your little one.
4) A marriage counselor can help you slowly restore your romantic and sexual connection (once you’re getting enough sleep and actually have a little energy to spare!).
5) Therapists are also trained in family dynamics, which may come in handy to get guidance on dealing with in-laws and extended family, and their role with the new baby.
Welcoming a baby into your relationship can be a joyful event, but also a very stressful one. It’s important to acknowledge the changes each of you is going through, learn to incorporate your new role as parents into your relationship, and give yourself permission to receive help and support to begin building the foundation of a well-functioning, happy family